Sanctity Of Life

My story is a story of a life in the hands of the Father.  I would not be here with you tonight if not for being held in His hands at the most vulnerable point in my life.  That point was in my mother’s womb.

You see during the pregnancy my mother had a serious health concern.  She had a kidney stone and only one kidney.  The doctor gave her two choices,  she must have an abortion or risk her life.  My parents submitted to the doctor’s advice and the abortion was performed.  After the abortion,  there was one complication,  my mother was still pregnant.  Of course the doctor was very concerned and said a second abortion must be performed, for this child would be severely deformed. 

After sleeping on it my mother felt the Lord wanted her to have this baby and refused.  I stand before you as miracle of the Lord’s protective hands; He would not allow me to be aborted.  

Psalm 139:13-16 is so true, “For you created my innermost being, you knit me together in my mother’s womb.  I praise You because I am fearfully and wonderfully made; my frame was not hidden from You when I was made in the secret place.  When I was woven together in the depths of the earth, Your eyes saw my unformed body.  All the days ordained for me were written in Your book before one of them came to be.”

My whole life I have felt His presence.  I have always been able to converse with the Father and see Him working in my life.  There are times in my life where I should have feared for my safety, yet I have always felt safe.  Fear is the tool of the enemy, but in the hands of the Most High there is nothing to fear.  

I sometimes wonder why me?

 I may never know completely.  I do know one answer is that He can do whatever He pleases.  The doctors wanted to take my life, but He would not allow it.  One thing to be clear on, is that a child in the womb is a life; a human being; a creation of God and no one has the right to take that life, no one except the author of life Himself.

That said, I know there maybe someone out there who has had an abortion.  I have a word from our Heavenly Father for you.   You are forgiven and your child was held in His hands at that moment and your child is in paradise with Him today.  If you know someone who is struggling because of an abortion give them this word and pray with them.

There are many times I have gotten off track and felt His gentle touch guiding me back.  Sometimes His words are gentle, other times they are quite firm.  He knows how to get the message through.

I have had a very blessed life, there have been struggles, but the blessings far outweigh the trials.  Even many of the trials have led to great blessings.  In all the challenges He has been there to get me through.  There are things I have accomplished which are beyond me.  Mark 9:23 says “Everything is possible for him who believes.”  With God I can do anything, on my own I will ultimately fail.  This is available for all who believe.

Sanctity of life is more than the life of an unborn child.  All life is sanctified.  Struggles and trials are a part of all our lives.  Let me tell you of one which caused deep buried pain in me and my experience in being healed by the Father’s hands.

First I want to say I loved my mother dearly and she was a wonderful person, a great friend to have.  We had many great moments together.  However there were three painful experiences in my life with her.  Two of the three were times she attempted suicide.  Both times she knew I would soon be there to rescue her.  In both cases I acted and did what I needed to save her life, but buried the feelings.  The third time was when she passed away. 

My mother had COPD and I knew she did not want to be on a ventilator in the case where breathing became more difficult.  I tried to call her hospice nurse and her doctor and got no response.  Finally I called 911 and the paramedics put her on a ventilator even though I explained to them she did not want that.  On the way to the hospital she ripped it off.   At the emergency room I was able to tell them what she had written on her chart and was allowed to be with her as she died, with no life support.  I had never experienced this before.

As I watched the look on her face looked to me like a look of disgust, a look I have seen before when she was disappointed.  The feeling I buried was that of guilt, justified or not, for not handling the situation perfectly.  Once again a feeling buried.  I did all I needed to do to prepare for her memorial service and handling her final affairs, but not a tear fell from my eyes.

For thirteen years this emotional and spiritual pain remained buried.   The Lord, as He always has, kept His loving hands on me and saw me through those years.  Protecting me and blessing me.  It remained buried until He felt I was ready for healing.  During the period of time I was writing my book, I was growing even closer to the Father.  One day when I was alone in prayer I heard a gurgling sound inside of me, like something trapped deep down coming out.  I started gagging and coughing, than finally a peace.  So what was this?  It was the Holy Spirit healing me.  It was two days later when I was in church suddenly memories of the night my mother died came to mind and for the first time I truly grieved. 

I know there are so many here tonight with buried pain.  There is only one cure.  Put it in the hands of the Father.   Build your relationship with Him through prayer, deep prayer.  He will dig deep and heal you.  Our Father wants to be with us and converse with us on everything, join Him in a holy relationship.  It will change your life.

http://westsidechristianfellowship.org/guest-speakers/1-17-15-brian-knapp-testimony-guest-speaker-brian-knapp/