My Struggle

“I tell you the truth, today you will be with Me in paradise.”  Luke 23:43

Jesus is talking here with a thief who saw who He was in the last moments of his life and is saved.  It does not go into the thief’s life.  Did he know God before he went down the path of crime?  Did he have a religious upbringing?  Was he Jewish and raised going to the Tabernacle?  We don’t know the answers to these questions of what is life was like.

What we do know is he was a man going down the wrong path and was about to receive the consequences of his choices, eternal consequences.  We know he repented and believed at that last moment before starting his eternal path.  It did not look good for him, but Jesus accepted his confession at that moment when the final path must be chosen.  A moment when Jesus himself was suffering greatly.  This gives tremendous hope.

Here is where I struggle.  I already know Christ in this way, I have a personal relationship with Him.  My struggle is that I too often veer onto a path Jesus warns us against.  So far I get a check from the Father warning me.  My fear is what if the day comes when I keep on that path and ignore the Lord’s warnings.  It is scary.

My only hope is that He holds on.  My task is stay near Him so I won’t slip away.  I must stay in His Word; I must stay in prayer; I must continue to journal as He gives me insight through His Word and answers to prayer and through others He uses in my life to give me clarity.

Thankfully He gives me hope when I stray.  If I do not receive that hope I devalue what Jesus did on the cross.  Thank You Father for the hope You give me; Thank You for the grace you have shown me.  For I am that thief waiting to hear:  “I tell you the truth, today you will be with Me in paradise.”  I live my life on that hope and look forward to that day.

Until that day I will follow the words of James, “Draw near to God and He will draw near to you.  Cleanse your hands, you sinners; and purify your hearts, you double-minded.”  James 4:8

As He draws near to me I am purified.  I cannot remain on the right path without that closeness to the Father; my Father; your Father.  Without keeping close I will go down the path of a double minded sinner.  Bring your mind into a single minded state, God’s state of mind.  Draw ever so near to Him and the struggle lessens.